Hard Headed

This posts title could read something like, "life's lessons" or "learning the hard way" or "I should of actually learned something from all of those dang discovery channel shows" but alas....

So it happened on a Wednesday.

It was a beautiful hot morning.

Finished teaching riding lessons...

I was expecting some petting zoo kids...

And I thought to myself

"What a perfect time to move all the sheep pens around."

I had three pens going at that moment.

1) teddy and Oreo (aka ram pen)

2) the ewes and lambs (no aka)

3) the barn pen with the newbies.

So I moved the ewes.

Fine.

Then I moved the new ewe in with the other ewes and lambs.

Fine.

Then I moved the new ram over to a pen by the other rams.

Fine.

I let them be.

They sniffed and walked up the fence line.

They ate.

I left and watered my garden.

Came back and thought.

"Humph, they seem fine"

So I put them in together.

They sniffed.

Oreo got bit high school so I kicked him out.

They big boys grazed.

I turned around. 

Walked out the gate and then heard the most sickening thud.

The girls were yelling.

The rams were in reverse to collide again.

And smack.

Blood flew everywhere.

The girls were now screaming.

I was running through all the possible options.

Smack.

I go back into the pen.

Smack. Crack.

The rams are covered in blood.

A bone is now sticking out of Teddy's face.

They back up again.

I pick up a tree and javelin it between them.

Pick up a halter and crack it across the new ones nose.

I pick up another tree and get teddy back on his side of the fence.

I get out of the pen.

And then I remember to breathe.

I call the vet.

Apparently "sheep people" aren't the same sorta breed as "horse people" because when I call about a horse- I get walked through a procedure.... A sheep bone out of a head..... I get... "It'll probably be fine-keep the flys out if it"

Ha

Anyways.

He is fine.

So the vet was right.

But 

At that moment...

All hopped up on adrenalin...

I was mad.

So I catch Oreo buy the horn

(He is kind of like a unicorn... Only way less beautiful)

And drag him to the barn.

Lock him in a horse stall.

Turn around to go get the new ram

And get half way across the yard

And see the stupid sheep out.

I am changing his name to Jackie Chan.

I catch him again.

Lock him in the tack room.

And go AGAIN across the yard.

I halter the very agitated 200lbs temper tantrum throwing 2' toddler/ram and "lead" it across the yard.

It is now like 40 degrees.

I then take Oreo who I am pretty sure would have ADHD and hyperactivity disorder out of my now absolutely trashed tack room and lead him by the horn across the yard.

After all this and moving the ewes back....

I laid on my lawn. I contemplated moving.

I contemplated sheep. Life.

Lesson 1)

When you think you have a brilliant idea.... Wait.... Let it sit for a while.... It will probably still be brilliant in 20 minutes and if it's not brilliant- it should give you enough time to not go through with it.

Lesson 2)

Never underestimate a male ego.

Lesson 3)

Life without animals would be so so so much easier 

But

Who really likes the easy way??