Har har Har har-dly funny

Today was a day for the books.

I was sick most of the night.

Woke up with a headache

(Boohoo- I know- )

Then

I went to go do chores.

I get the the hen 

(We have a hen with 3 chicks)

And yesterday I cleaned out her nest.

It was stinking up to high heavens

There were some dead chicks and cracked eggs.

It was nasty.

Anyways.

Cleaned it all up.

Removed all eggs.

So today there is an egg.

I pick it up.

It stinks.

But

She stinks.

I am not one to judge....

I totally get not having enough time to bathe 

And

I only have one baby!

So I get to the house and my kids are hungry.

I start the stove 

And put a pan on.

I turn around to wash eggs.

I forget about the pan.

The house starts smoking

I turn around

FIRE

like lots of it.

I set the egg down on the counter.

I grab the pan.

I hear a pop.

I get out faster.

I come back inside 

Then

It hits me

The most disgusting smell on the whole planet.

(I have smelled some pretty gross things)

It was the egg that popped.

It exploded EVERYWHERE.

Gross

Disgusting

Green egg

Yuck!

Now my house smells like rotten pickled egg.

Dusty thought this was funny

The whole thing.

I do not.

My kids do not.

My mom (who showed up just in time to help clean up) does not think this was funny.

I wish that pan would of burnt down the whole kitchen!

I will never get the smell out of my nose.

When all is Quiet on the Farm

I woke this morning 

to

the phone ringing.

I went out to 

let the horses out on pasture

and I heard

birds chirping

and geese waddling in the weeds

I heard clucking 

and panting dogs

I heard the stamp of hooves

but

I did not hear 

the crows of the 

rooster(s).

I feel guilty.

I gave the order.

The girls all had 

their faces

plastered to the glass

in 

absolute fascination.

I cleaned.

I ran the water.

I banged pots

I did anything

NOT

to hear the dying sounds

of the rooster.

I used to think

I had a thick skin

when it came to the

facts of life.

I have been on the end 

of many ropes while 

our horses have been 

euthanized

I have gone hunting with my dad

and while I have

NO desire to shoot 

anything

it did not bug me when he did

BUT

I am left

feeling a little guilty today

on a quieter than normal farm.

It's all fun and games....

These are {my} chickens.

The kids love them.

they started laying eggs 

and

the novelty of gathering them 

has

yet 

to disappear.

We had 4 roosters.

Slowly they have died.

One death due to donkeys

two suspicious deaths

Have us thinking

the yellow dog may be the culprit.

So we are left with 1 rooster.

We all like the rooster.

He was our favourite.

but

Last week in an unfortunate incident

he woke me up at 4

and then

a few days later attacked me

I threw a couple shoes at him

and he decided to walk away.

THEN

he chased Ellie across the yard.

This morning the rooster finally sealed his fate...

You never mess with Dusty

he has too many guns.

While out doing chores with Penny

the rooster tried to spur her in the face.

He missed.

Unfortunately for him

Dusty will not...

Learning

Okay.

First thing is first.

Last night there was a family dance at the school.

It wasn't so much a family dance

as it was more

mayhem and chaos.

Kids running around

twirling uncontrollably

large doses of sugar.

A spectacular time had by the children.

Well.

next.

I saw from a distance a person I hadn't seen since

High School.

He was a "grown-up"

{not really mature in the sense of behavior 

but mature in the sense

 he was a bit older and actually had facial hair}

Anyways.

I immediately knew who he was.

He was nice back then.

He seemed nice now.

Married.

kids.

etc.

I 

NORMALLY

would avoid all contact.

But I figured my hair was done...

I know I was bound to run into him again..

{since our kids are now in the same school}

so I bit the bullet.

I walked up.

Oh gosh.

What was I thinking?!?

He recognized me

{I think}

I am pretty sure he has NO CLUE what my name is.

I asked him if he remembered who I was....

WHAT?

Man, I wish I could delete the things that come out 

and rephrase them into a much more cool 

or at least less awkward phrase.

After 2 minutes of excruciating small talk

i bee-lined it for someone else.

Phew.

Never again.

Well now that 

that is over...

Tiger is getting spayed today.

Which is good.

Because as much as the children love her

I was still contemplating

having her have an accident.

After a month of being in heat

I can take no more.

See Tiger below.

To her benefit she is an excellent mouser.

and she is really patient with the girls 

and their friends.

I think maybe it's the warm weather that had effected Tiger.

Because

Bill and Jeff are being RIDICULOUS.

so noisy.

and very inappropriate for the front yard....

{did you know that you can buy Turkey and Geese "saddles"}

The things you learn when looking at incubation units....

And I just threw this one in.

She helps me hold the chickies when I clean their box.

Poor Poor Chickies.....

Flu Bird

The last week I have been waging war with a virus.

I have been tired.

dare I say

~ Grumpy~

and wee bit unmotivated.

I just kept pushing through.

Busy is good.

Fresh air is better.

Horse smell will cure most things I am sure.

Alas,

I have succumbed to the virus.

I am blaming the chicks.

I got up a million times to check the thermometer.

95 degrees is hard to maintain!!

Then there was my real children....

but I won't complain about them

{at least not right now}

So today I am wrapped in a blanket.

I am reading blogs.

Pinning on pinterest.

Avoiding looking at my bank account

looking a facebook.

Oh and by the way....

Blocked poop vents are not so easy to clean.

Baby bums are much easier.

I never thought 

I would have the pleasure 

of poking a chicken butt 

with a tooth pick 

after dunking the tush 

(do chickens have tushes) 

in warm water.

But 

I have now had the pleasure.

I hope that

like most things

poking chicken butts will get easier

the more you do it.

Because I gotta say

Google made it sound a LOT easier

than it was!

First Time Mom

I remember finding out I was pregnant

{the first time}

and being excited and thrilled.

I wanted to know everything.

I googled.

I talked to my friends.

I talked to my mom.

I talked to other new moms.

I thought I was prepared.

I was nervously confidant 

I had Ellie.

She was perfect.

Things just kicked in.

I made a few mistakes.

I learned a lot more.

I still learn.

One thing that I love about homesteading/ hobby farming...

is the firsts.

Chicks are a first.

I have to be honest...

I am not a chicken lady.

I hope that my inner chicken lady emerges.

I am more nervous about chickens than I was about babies.

and now

I have 

baby chickens.

EEEEEK.

I have prepared.

I have built baby bird waterers

I have created a baby chick feeder.

I have nested.

they are here.

and 

I am more freaked out.

i really hope I don't kill them.

I have talked to other chicken ladies.

they assure me I am ready.

I really hope I Don't kill them....

{the egg carton feeder}

{it works like a charm}

{the Sour cream waterer}

{this took a little more ingenuity but I figured it out after a few botched attempts at other waterers}

{them in action}

Dusty built me a really awesome cat-proof lid

I will have to take another picture.